Caffeinated Bitch
2002-01-16 - 10:20 p.m.
Is it normal to have a vicious craving for Kentucky Fried Chicken at 10 p.m. on a school night?
I'm thinking no. But that's what's happening to me. It's like I can actually smell the chicken right here in the room. My sensory memory is mocking me with the greasy goodness and eleven herbs and spices. Damn.
So, what did I do today? Lots of piddly ass shit and some really really important stuff. The piddly ass shit saw me inflict two more goddamn papercuts on my already battle scarred hands. Now, normally I wouldn't complain about papercuts--I mean really, they're more annoying than painful. Unless of course, your hands have a tendency to become dry and crackly without excessive amounts of lotion massaged into them on a regular basis throughout the day. Then, those little, tiny, miniscule, minor injuries feel like you've just set your hand on fire when you coat them up with the precious moisture-giving goo. Owie.
Also owie inducing are the bruises and scrapes from my pratfall on the dancefloor Saturday night. Of course, my gracefull ass makes certain to slam my wounded leg into the side of my desk at least twice an hour, further heaping on the misery. Why, o why, do I lack the coordination to complete simple tasks like walking or rolling my chair under the desk without putting my eye out? You know, I'm so fucking klutzy, I can totally understand how a grown man who's been eating food for more than forty years can choke and pass out while eating a pretzel.
Sweet merciful crap! The years of falling, tripping, rolling ankles, and smacking into things has made me sympathetic to a Republican!! The horror!
I did do some good stuff today. Like actual counselor stuff even. I finally talked to a parent I didn't want to smack. That's got to be some sort of record or something. Maybe I'm sick. I know I'm fucking tired. Stupid caffeine. I was tired before my night class last night, so I thought a cappucino would be a nice little pick me up at 5:30. Sure, it picked me up. It picked my ass up and drove it around in a pimped out Lincoln Town Car until damn near 2 a.m. Then it smacked my face, made me call it Big Daddy and give it all my cash. As I finally fell asleep, I swore off the evil stuff ...
Until this morning when I could barely see to drive, I was so fucking sleepy. More caffeine. And more. All day long. Am I the dumbest person alive or what? Now, it's after 10 p.m. I should be all snuggled under the covers, getting my precious few hours of beauty sleep before going to face a gaggle of hormonally crazed adolescents caged in a large brick building. What am I doing instead? Sitting here at the goddamn computer, pissed at myself for being caffeine's bitch again. I am the weakest whore alive.
My class for which I'm GAing met tonight. I think I'm actually going to (brace yourself) learn something in that class. I know! What a change from the usual hoop-jumping and bullshit-speweing that I normally complete for my classes. Bonus here? Since I'm the GA, people don't get all snitty and bitter when I know stuff. Go me!
Only two more days left to a three-day weekend. Unfortunately, both of those days will be spent with 8th graders. And even more unfortunate is that I'll be spening my three-day weekend at my parents'. I'm at once full of dread and anticipation. Lovely.
I wonder what time I'll come down from my caffeine high?
